re-establish

I believe this entry is specifically for myself for the fact that I made a commitment. I made a commitment to keep a blog. I need to keep this commitment; I need to keep the flow a flowing. The blog was started weeks ago and I find it very useful. My mind is so scattered and wild that the best thing I can do is to record these radical thoughts. So the purpose of this entry is simply to Re-establish a connection with my thoughts and put them down for the purpose of being recorded. I find it easier and cleaner to convey my thoughts through typing versus handwriting.

some songs for the fans...

Tear by RHCP
www.chinavbox.cn/show/UU04I8IO.html

Y Control by Yeah Yeah Yeahs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3zPbBMbnjI&feature=fvst

Mr. Bojangles by Sammy Davis Jr.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=du22wApJqvs

talking out loud and top 3 meals...

I've been home from China for over a year. The home welcoming ran out about 6 months ago and the pressure to stabilize is building . Since my return to our wonderful country, whatever ideas and dreams my brain concocts, I've been acting on. From acting, boxing, art, to starting businesses like construction companies, importing, clothing and so forth.

My experience is to live my dreams. Bottom Line. Whatever I enjoy doing--DO! And yes, I am a realist! Yes I have responsibilities, not many. And yes, I have bills and goals that are "weighing" over me. But this ONE life is so precious; therefore, I am working on BALANCING right now. I am still following my nose but also looking for some stability. Something to help me excel and help me grow. It will happen and when it does...Boom, boom pow. My list of evidence is 1000s of pages long. Life keeps getting better and better. "The proof's in the pudding."

So my plan of action is to get some sort of part time gig to stabilize my mysteriously abundant life. Just saying.

Top Three Meals... Ever

3) I was camping out in Guelph a couple weeks back and was overwhelmed with the surprise dinner of a life time. Kevin Campbell http://dreamsandaspirationsofkevin.blogspot.com (his blog)
pulled together one of the most tantalizing meals I've had. This meal was unexpected which really sets it apart from other delicious meals. It's campsite setting mixed with the perfect company also set this meal above the rest. It was all about the sauteed, caramelized onions stuck to the fried pirogies; baked potatoes with an abundant amount of fixings; the steak, brought to us by Buckingham's in Oshawa, was out of control.

2) Again there was a surprise element to this number two dinner. I knew I was going out for a special dinner but had no idea where. There was this hotel in Dalian, China called Shang Ri La. This place is totally high-end, or Next Level for that matter. I was accompanied by a tall, exotic, sexy Chinese woman, named Madison, who set up the whole extravagant evening for me. It turned out to be a buffet. I remember the hearty tacos, fresh sushi, athentic spaghetti, real bread (I mean, real bread, made with oats and sh*t) etc. It was food I had not eaten in months, western food. Food that I totally took for granted. Food that was made to please. The price on this meal was the most I have ever seen. It was $500.00 a plate. To top it all off and setting this meal apart from the rest... it was her treat! Boom, boom pow!

1) This one is easy. Every meal that I go out to have with the family is the best dinner ever. Hands down.

YOU PICKIN' UP WHAT IM PUTTING DOWN??????

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today's top ten songs

I would like to think I have somewhat of a responsibility. I must share my wild thoughts with the public. I feel like the majority of what you read on a day to day basis is rather drab, fake and thought preventing. So by me sharing me, I stay in the light and I hopefully spark some life in you.

Today entry is easy... top ten songs I've been listening to today...

your welcome! LOL

But no order...

John Frusciante - Dying Song
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GTyf9gP_yY&NR=1

John Frusciante - Scratches
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ESgqwH8pJ0c

Valerie Shaw - Old Apartment (cover)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-9DY8ROKZUE

Wolfmother - Joker and the Thief
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWvdKPpVWzw

Peter Bjorn and John - Up Against the Wall
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbWemy7dwUE

Point Blank - You Don't Want It Wit Us
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OLOjmmb94ec

Elvis P- Devil in Disguise
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m3_Q96eJr1k

Solitaire - Easy 2 Slip
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZlprQpCtuc

Limp Bizkit - Build a Bridge
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H_uxdL8tJ00&feature=related

The Smiths - How Soon is Now?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_U5HpeA_WSo

PS I just figured out how to add the links. Now you can just click away.

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prayers and cereal

Do you pray?

Why? Why not?

I do. I have prayed when I thought it was just a false sense of security. I have prayed when I've felt connected to the universe and it's every shift. I have prayed and felt nothing and I have prayed when I felt it all. While praying, I have heard answers; and during, I have made up my own. I've prayed when at the end of my road and I've prayed at the beginning.

Today I am guided after prayer. I pray today because it connects me to the universe. It's a tool that keeps me grounded and in touch with myself and others--connected. I spent a portion of my life disconnected. Talking to the higher power, creator, universe is the only thing that puts me back in the moment. Really, it is a combination of talking and listening.

I recently read a cartoon that read, "Prayer - How to do nothing and still think you're helping." I thought this was hilarious. I also feel this is a common perception. For me it is not that way at all, since my prayers ain't very conventional or religious. And since I have an endless evidence list of how my prayers have worked and come to fruition.

Through years of prayer I have built a foundation, a connection, a relationship with ______. I have never been so compassionate, so reliable, so generous, so easy, SO FREE.

I, too, am surprised I am exploiting my personal relationship with up above. But at the same time, "I have nothing to fear." And I am I want to be part of the solution in the fact that talking about GOD and is so taboo, private and personal. Personal and private is one thing but taboo...

Extra Extra: New Trend Alert!
For the optimal breakfast experience, start mixing cereals! For example, I mix Vector, Mini Wheats and Harvest Crunch for the absolute best cereal I've ever jammed in my mouth.

Start concocting. Raisin Bran, Honey Nuts and Mini Wheats. Quite frankly, mixing Mini Wheats with any cereal is going to blow you away. Please start sharing your own concoctions with the rest of the world.

Can't think of any concoctions? Pray abou it

truly the best medicine...

For the longest time, I had my head set on being a stand-up comedian. I always have loved to make people laugh whether I told jokes or wrote them in stories. It is right up there for being one my favourite things in the world to do, watching someone laugh. I find it so invigorating. It's even like a weird fetish. Let me explain, when I watch a hilarious clip on the computer or TV, I love sharing it with others and in this instance I think most people do the same. But where my fetish fit in, is when I get others to watch the funny clip, and I just stare at them; infatuated with their facial expressions while they watch. So the next time I am watching you laugh... now you know... I am enjoying myself.

Making people laugh is in my blood but it comes in waves. When I was growing up in high school I was nominated Class Clown two years in a row and lost both years... ha! Once, I even did my stand up routine at Yuk Yuks on amateur night. I took myself to downtown TO and did a 5-6 min routine. I got some chuckles and a few "eeewwws" lol. I learned two things from that experience. One, next time I do it bring some close friends; don't go alone. And second, try your shit out on people before unloading on a crowd.

What does all this mean? Nothing. But I did attach a top ten list of comedians. Yes I did. Here are 10 links for different comedians that I adore or at least adore these specific routines/shows.

(Warning: A couple links are a little racy.)

Top ten routines.

10 - Nick Swardson http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9wBK2eY_zgs
9 - Lance Krall http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5JHgnFQ-eCY
8 - Zach Galifianakis http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7ywNaGpqZw
7 - Chris Rock http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWERzwbobOk
6 - Dave Chapelle (explicit) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GD1z789p1vc&feature=related
5 - Jerry Dee http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=llPKgjyT1RU&feature=related
4- Sam Kinison http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_VURr6jnWQ
3 -Dane Cook http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sAJOrr4C6D4&feature=related
2 - Dave Chapelle & Eddie Murphy (2 Geniuses) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NdDxVZkytxI&feature=related
1 - Jerry Seinfeld http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ca2JwbOXnhg&feature=related

Honourable mentions: Mitch Hedberg, Harland Williams, Robin Williams, Jim Carrey, etc.

laughing... the best medicine...

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next level art

I suppose it is time to start sharing about the art I have been creating with my brother. The more I open up about it, the more excited I get. And for the record, I am certainly not opposed to selling my art, but my motives are based on art being my outlet. Man, I love it. So powerful. Before my last fight, that did not happen, art was the only thing that saved my brain from becoming unbalanced--for real. I am one to pray and meditate but it was painting that totally alleviated me from my destructive, aggressive and draining thoughts.

It all started a few months ago when my brother came home with a giant canvas, some paints and a lost look on his face. A generous man, by the name of Peter, came up with this wonderful idea for my brotha. He bought this large 4'x3' canvas and told my bro to go home paint some funky shit and we will sell it to the rich... Ha!

From that point Snips, my brother, and I have been painting like we're art wizards or something. Each piece we create evolves from the the previous one. The fact that we collaborate our skills and put everything we have into one piece is a real cool feeling. To be able to share that creativity with someone else is Next Level. Our style, two artists painting together, may have been done before, but I have not heard of it. So semi-original... Plus tons of work we do is revolved around my fighting and I love attaching those stories to the art. But most of all, our work also comes from a different realm, as Snips is in a totally different place then I am. So we mix like nothing else.

Our art is the NEXT LEVEL... check it out... better yet, start painting yourself and we can put on a show together... hmmm?

You can find our the Next Level Art here:

http://www.facebook.com/tyler.tilley?ref=profile#/profile.php?id=1807673228&ref=ts

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god bless you ozzy for my desire to be great

Here is a thought that came to me today. It was this overwhelming desire to be great. Great as in being in the spotlight, changing the world for the better, sacrifice and wanting my story to be shared--that type of great. Now there are many types of "greatness" don't get me wrong. But this thought I had was a different kind. It was based on a fearless existence for the most part. Living each day as it was my last but not knowing I'm doing so because that is just who I am. Sharing the REAL core of my being. Trying new experiences after new experiences. Living the dream and sharing it with the world. I am sharing this because I think this type of greatness can be achieved... by me, you, everyone. Just gotta feed that desire, once you find it.

Funny, this thought stemmed from a few music videos I was listening to on youtube. I witnessed a compilation of Ozzy Osbourne's life in the video "In My Life." Now, don't get me wrong, there is no comparison to the original beatles' version, but this cover does pull a few heart strings. I think this video envokes emotion because this physcopath is only human and to see him in such a light where this video just plays various highlights of his twisted life is rather inspirational. He just lives. And the more popular he became over time the more he lost and found himself in this wild world. When I look at his life, from what I know of it, with a completely open mind, what a cool story he has. I'm no Sabbath historian or anything but I know what I know. He just lives, experiences and as you look back on his past through 2 minutes of clips you can see that each day could have been his last. God bless you Ozzy Osbourne, LOL.

Why Ozzy? Not sure but that's what sparked my desire.

and of course the link...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ns6wBo0gzk

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allergies

Allergies, my Achilles heel. This is a rather humorous and ironic entry considering my last posting was all about camping and the great outdoors... And now I am going to rant about my insidious disease, or whatever it is, especially since it consumed me my last day of camping.

I started getting allergies around 20 years old. Or at least that's when I put the pieces together that it was not an everlasting head cold. Around the same time is when I also got tested and the doc did the traditional needle test where they prick your skin with about 50 different, but common, allergens. My arm blew up. The doc reported my allergies were "very severe." He recommended I get biweekly shots and every year I claim I will go and get them. It has yet to happen.

Every year I fight this 4 month long allergic reaction to the outside. As spring approaches, I start to get a taste of the inevitable sinus pain that is to come. And each year I try a different defense. Last year's defense was all mental. The game plan was simple--I don't have allergies; they are all in my mind. And I still believe this to an extent. Well I had to believe it if it was gonna work. I think it helped quite a bit actually. The more I believed I did not have allergies the less power they had.

Through my experience I have been able to compose a personal prescription that I will share for any of those people that be struggling. The prescription is so, if I do not get the proper sleep my body, mind is a lot more susceptible to more frequent, greater and longer attacks. I discovered this bad combo when I mixed lack of sleep with pollen. Another method to arresting this sinus crisis is to take allergy medication regularly; not just when I get an attack. I find if I build an immunity to my allergies by taking a pill regularly it is far more effective. And to finish it off, as I mentioned before, I do not have allergies!! They are just a figment of my imagination.

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camping...

I'm in that zone. The going away for the weekend zone. CAMPING. Camping a MUST! At least once a year. I find the older I get, the more I start saying things like, 'We live in such a beautiful country, we have to enjoy it.' Today I believe that to be true. We have so much beyond our little cities. Camping is so cheap and so raw compared to other getaways. Its all about bonding, living with less, appreciating Mother Earth and relying on Mother Earth. Like I said, you don't need to go every weekend but at least once a summer is in my best interest. I count on it. It's grounding. This time around we are going up with a shit load of people and it should just be bananas.

Hence, I am totally in the mood for songs such as these...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G758sG8A1v8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yWUbNcIoEXA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GyA8zfouG4Y

It's the weekend. Enjoy--that's your job! Your pay happiness!

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no fight + the experiement

I am in such a good place. I feel totally free and alive.

My boxing match was canceled yesterday. I found out when I arrived on site. First I was told my original opponent quit his boxing club this week, so he was scratched. Then they asked a former opponent of mine to come down and he graciously declined. Then I was told they had a fighter coming down for me but he was heavier in weight. So I was told, "Go gain weight." Then that guy didn't show.

It took some time for the adjustment to sink it. At first I was in disbelief, and yet somewhat relieved. But then disappointment and fear settled in but did not stay long. Being ready physically to step in that ring is one thing, but being ready mentally is a whole other sport. I was ready mentally and falling from that mental place, that was hard. But man, do I feel great today! Hands down, everything happens for a reason, but it's up to me to embrace it.

Next on the agenda is an interesting experience that happened to me this morning. When I look at this particular experience and examine the way I am about to, it is somewhat of an interesting experiment with very raw results.

What happened was this. After a few great meetings with a few close friends, I was feeling amazing this morning. Life just felt in place and all together. While I was feeling so blissful I wanted to share that experience with the world. So I blasted out a text message to pretty much everyone one in my phone book. Bosses, old bosses, old friends, new ones, acquaintances, old relationships, girls, guys, etc. It was the same text message to everyone and it read as this...

Woww! You're so aweome!

Where it gets fascninating is the responses I received and continue to receieve! As soon as I sent out the text message to everyone, the reponses came piling in. And it is the responses for which I find this whole ordeal so important. And I am giong to share the reponses, not who said them of course, but still going to list them none the less. These responses are so amazing; so human.

The orginal text:
- Woww! You're so awesome!

Responses:
- lol, why?
- No I am not
- What?
- Why?
- Haha, why do you say that?
- So are you!!!!!! Good day...... Tyler
- Why am I so awesome?
- Thanks bro, I'm just about to venture into the rain downtown
- Life is so awesome
- Who is this?
- LOL why bro?
- Is this ty with the silverado?
- Thank you I think you're amazing
- But so are you
- Thanks bro I feel awesome! Right back at you brother. I feel so connected
- I didn't do anything
- Why am I so awesome?
- Your awesomer!!!
- Why
- Was that msg ment 4 someone else lol
- I try not to B so vain
- Are you being serious or sarcastic
- O well thank you! ur awesome 2!
- Oh Tyler, hi bro thank you for that very encouraging text love ya bro
- Oh lol man I'm having a terrible day. Thanks you cheered me up. Pretty much made my day.
- You are baby baby
- Meaning? Awesome why?
- Solid
- Thanks man. Good to know
- Ha ha naw
- Why?
- You're awesome!!! I love you!!
- What that lmao
- Me!!! I think you're the awesome one.
- Why
- Why's that and how did the fight go
- You in the city soon?
- Ty and u are awesome too!

WOW! Need I say more? The only reason I am sharing this info, because it is rather near and dear to me, is because I just find it so raw and mixed and honest.

Let me know your thoughts on this....

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